Tuesday, July 6, 2010

Ramblings and Observations

So if any of you have heard Johnny Cash sing, The Beast in Me, you understand what I am about to say...if you have not heard it...go listen!

We all have a beast...even though we don't always want to face it, admit it or knock it down. I myself have several...yikes...so hard to admit. The beast of RA and Fibromyalgia that has struck me all the way down today.  But more 'bout that later, because the fun stuff is so much better!

Two of my dearest friends Brad and Shirley came to Albuquerque from Amarillo on the Goldwing. (a NICE bike!)  We stayed at the Drury Hotel, which is a great place with TONS of extras. 

I tend to be a people watcher, and one observation I noticed this weekend is that 99% of the people staying in a hotel are generally happy.  On one of my morning smoke breaks, I noticed that everyone would tell each other "good morning" or some other kind of general humanistic statement.  It reminded me of the 2 weeks prior to Christmas; everyone gets cheerful and joyful.  Shirley and I decided to bring back the good ole days and we laid out in the sunshine, which brought on even more cheerful thoughts.  I LOVE to give Brad a hard time and tease the heck out of him.  We are great at bantering back and forth at each other.  One thing I have to say is just how much I love and respect Brad as a husband to Shirley.  He was so patient with us girls being goofy and taking forever at everything we did!  (I am SURE he wanted to choke at least one of us a time or two over the course of the weekend!)   My respect grew even more as I watched Brad open the car door for Shirley in such a loving way.  Brad, you rock the male world!

I am enjoying my new status of a divorced woman.  This has been a huge issue for me to "deal" with, but now that I am, I am so happy to have that chapter of my life over and done.  Now, I can really learn who I am in my little casita and just enjoy the rest of my God given life.  Mack enjoys it too!

Even though it was a very relaxing and calm weekend, the ugly head of my beast reared its ugly head this morning.  The brain fog is as if I had just awoke from a deep coma. My knees, ankles and back are killing me!  I called my rheumatologist this morning to see if I could get my infusion.  This is another sore spot with me right now.  Medicare will not approve Rituxan until I am in a full-blown flair.  WTF??!!  It has been 6 months since my last infusion, and now I have to wait until the pain is visible to the naked eye of Medicare.  I started taking Methotrexate again to try to relieve some of the destruction going on in the joints.  I do not like to take it, as the side effects are wicked, and it makes me so sick. 

My ramblings and observations for this post have made me tired.  So,I will put all stress and feelings of lazy guilt aside; and enjoy some quiet time reading and enjoying a beautiful summer day.
Cheers to the world and have a hummer of a day!!